Our Baby Boy Turns One!

Dear Benaiah,

Never did I know how much and how easily I could love a little boy that didn't come from me, doesn't look like me and that I had so little time to prepare my heart for. Only God can grow a mother's love like this in such a special way. You are one spectacular little boy, and I am truly honored that I get to be your momma. 

There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about the very different choice your selfless birth mother made. She gave you life and because of her great love for you, she made the hardest decision to give you a different opportunity to grow up in - one that is away from her. I'm so thankful for her, and I'm so glad she is still in our lives. On your birthday she texted my before 5am remembering that was the time her water broke. She wished her "little prince" a happy birthday. She loves you so much. And how can she not?

Your smile lights up a room, and you smile often. You have brought so much joy into our home and there hasn't been a moment that one of your older siblings has fussed because you were taking too much of my attention. They love you immensely, and they love to play with you, hold you and help you. 

You are making all kinds of talking sounds, crawling and pulling up. You only have 2 front teeth but somehow you manage to eat just about anything we are eating. You especially love scrambled eggs, pineapple and green beans. You liked your birthday cake but didn't quite know what to do with it when we put it in front of you. 

We had a safari theme for your 1st birthday, and it was so fun to celebrate you. Your story is already touching lives, and your happy countenance is already bringing joy. How exciting it will be to watch how much your grow and change in this next year. 

We love you so much Baby B, 
Momma

An Island Surprise

My husband is very good to me. I love his heart for giving and his constant goal to take care of me well and spoil me. He goes above and beyond! He's not trying to outdo anyone but he hopes other men will be inspired to love on their wives the same. I love that. 

Right before Christmas he shared with me that we were going away for a weekend on a marriage retreat with some good friends. Shortly thereafter, I realized it was the same weekend as an annual ministry moment my mom and I have participated in the last 4 years. I kindly asked him to move the weekend. He said he couldn't. That didn't make sense to me because I knew the marriage retreat people were flexible (these are private retreats at their home). So after a few days of pressing, he caved. Our friends came over and the husbands declared they were actually taking us to Antigua, West Indies for 5 days in January. Seriously!? This is why he couldn't move the dates. They set up the airline, lodging and the caretaking of children for while we were away. They also prepared questions to reflect on 2018 and consider what God had in store for 2019, so our conversation was intentional and purposeful. I love that. At the initial news, I was shocked and excited and fighting guilt at the same time. I knew that a break from the tiny humans I'm in charge of was needed, but that mom guilt is a strong force. And my parents! Would they still like their grandchildren after this? 

Well, my fears were unnecessary, of course, because it is OK to take time away to be with your husband, reconnect and refocus. And the kids did well (so they told me). 

Here are some pictures from our very fabulous 5 days. It was refreshing, relaxing and intentional. We enjoyed several evenings outside with live music and conversations about God, where He's leading each of our families, how we want to parent better and differently, what our wins have been and where we are still struggling. It was so good, y'all! And what a gift to have friends and folks that hold us accountable and call us out for these things we talked about. Not always easy, but very fruitful and necessary if we know we need to change or really want to meet a goal. 

We each had a small villa with a porch overlooking tropical green and the bright blue sea. 

Cocobay Resort. 

Our first full day, we took our one and only excursion outside of the small resort. We enjoyed a 6 hour private charter on a catamaran complete with sailing, snorkeling and delicious food!

Relaxed. Completely. 

Check out these full face snorkels. I never quite got used to it but they were better than a regular snorkel. 

Cassie and I sailing on Catch the Cat catamaran. 

Love this guy. 

Check out the rainbow. We saw several of these beauties on our sailing adventure. 

So pretty. Notice the yachts in the background. There were a lot of these around. For a mere half a million + you could rent your own for a week (a week! Insanity.).

Going to dinner. 

The view from the resort's beach. 

This is part of the resort. The restaurant we ate in for every meal was outside and overlooking the water. 

A beautiful sunset. 

Such a treat to view this every day. 

From our favorite table in the restaurant, we could see the infinity pool and the lovely water. 

So thankful for our time in Antigua and our time together.